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If you’ve ever learned a lesson the hard way in the Quarter, this shirt is your public service announcement.
Rule #1: No open toe shoes in the Quarter.
Because Bourbon Street does not care about your pedicure, your dignity, or your ability to emotionally recover from what’s on that pavement.
This tee is for the locals, the frequent offenders, and the people who say “I listen & I judge” while actively doing both. Front is subtle sass. Back is a full-on warning label. It’s blunt, it’s bold, and it absolutely will make tourists uncomfortable - as it should.
Wear it while day drinking, night drinking, brunching, judging footwear choices, or explaining to someone from Ohio why flip flops are a mistake. This shirt doesn’t whisper, because it reads you aloud.
💖 The boring but necessary details:
100% cotton (soft enough for recovery days)
Sport Grey: 90% cotton / 10% polyester
Ash Grey: 99% cotton / 1% polyester
Heather colors: 50% cotton / 50% polyester
Fabric weight: 5.0–5.3 oz/yd² (light, breathable, bar-approved)
Open-end yarn
Tubular fabric (no awkward side seams)
Taped neck and shoulders for durability
Double seam at sleeves and bottom hem
Blank product sourced from Honduras, Nicaragua, Haiti, Dominican Republic, Bangladesh, Mexico
Put it on. Judge responsibly.
Pink Pony Chub behavior only. 🦄💅🍸
Disclaimers:
• Due to the fabric properties, the White color variant may appear off-white rather than bright white.
• Dark color speckles throughout the fabric are expected for the color Natural.
Bourbon Gravy
$26.00
Rule #1: No open toe shoes in the Quarter.
Because Bourbon Street does not care about your pedicure, your dignity, or your ability to emotionally recover from what’s on that pavement.
This tee is for the locals, the frequent offenders, and the people who say “I listen & I judge” while actively doing both. Front is subtle sass. Back is a full-on warning label. It’s blunt, it’s bold, and it absolutely will make tourists uncomfortable - as it should.
Wear it while day drinking, night drinking, brunching, judging footwear choices, or explaining to someone from Ohio why flip flops are a mistake. This shirt doesn’t whisper, because it reads you aloud.
💖 The boring but necessary details:
100% cotton (soft enough for recovery days)
Sport Grey: 90% cotton / 10% polyester
Ash Grey: 99% cotton / 1% polyester
Heather colors: 50% cotton / 50% polyester
Fabric weight: 5.0–5.3 oz/yd² (light, breathable, bar-approved)
Open-end yarn
Tubular fabric (no awkward side seams)
Taped neck and shoulders for durability
Double seam at sleeves and bottom hem
Blank product sourced from Honduras, Nicaragua, Haiti, Dominican Republic, Bangladesh, Mexico
Put it on. Judge responsibly.
Pink Pony Chub behavior only. 🦄💅🍸
Disclaimers:
• Due to the fabric properties, the White color variant may appear off-white rather than bright white.
• Dark color speckles throughout the fabric are expected for the color Natural.
Size guide
| LENGTH (inches) | WIDTH (inches) | SLEEVE LENGTH (inches) | |
| S | 28 | 18 | 15 ⅝ |
| M | 29 | 20 | 17 |
| L | 30 | 22 | 18 ½ |
| XL | 31 | 24 | 20 |
| 2XL | 32 | 26 | 21 ½ |
| 3XL | 33 | 28 | 22 ¾ |
| 4XL | 34 | 30 | 24 ¼ |
| 5XL | 35 | 32 | 25 ¼ |
| LENGTH (cm) | WIDTH (cm) | SLEEVE LENGTH (cm) | |
| S | 71.1 | 45.7 | 39.7 |
| M | 73.7 | 50.8 | 43.2 |
| L | 76.2 | 55.9 | 47 |
| XL | 78.7 | 61 | 50.8 |
| 2XL | 81.3 | 66 | 54.6 |
| 3XL | 83.8 | 71.1 | 58 |
| 4XL | 86.4 | 76.2 | 61.5 |
| 5XL | 89 | 81.3 | 64.3 |